Vicious [Pretty Little Liars #16]

In Rosewood, Pennsylvania, reporters are lined up outside the historic courthouse, typing furiously at their iPhones with freshly manicured nails. Because the trial of the century is happening right here in Rosewood: the four pretty little liars have been accused of killing Alison DiLaurentis. Only Aria, Spencer, Hanna, and Emily know that they've been framed. Ali is still out there, laughing as she watches the girls go down for her murder. But when your nickname includes the word "liar," no one believes you're telling the truth. . . . Aria tries to run away from it all but finds that life on the lam is even harder than life as a liar. Spencer gets in touch with someone who can help her disappear--but when a guy from her past reemerges, Spencer no longer knows what she wants. Hanna decides that she'll hear wedding bells chime before she serves time. And in the face of prison, Emily does something truly drastic--something that will change her friends' lives forever. As the trial goes on and the outcome looks grim, the girls are in their darkest hour yet. But maybe they can finally figure out how to beat Ali at her own game. Because once upon a time, she was just a pretty little liar too

Vicious takes place not that far after Toxic ended. We get a glimpse of a triumphant if not slightly...changed Ali (Apparently, she's gained some weight, dyed her hair and fucked up her skin all in the name of hiding who she really is) gloating over the success of her plan. she watches in the news in her hideaway with someone whose identity isn't revealed til the end of the book. But it's also pretty damn obvious. Ali recalls the same details we all already know about her previous crime and her fake diary and what not (P.S. what the fuck kind of captor lets their kidnappee write in a journal? That makes no damn sense. Gone Girl much?)

The first scene of the novel opens with the hopelessness of the Liar's case. They have lost everything. Hanna lost her movie deal and invitation to go to the Fashion Institute in New York. Spencer's bully blog as become a wasteland and her acceptance to Princeton revolved, Aria is no longer a sought after artist. They have gone through a feat of lawyers and none of them believe that Ali is alive or setting them up. Even the guy they have now who got mafia bosses out of murder charges doesn't think he can help them.

Emily can't take it. The girl has officially gone coo-coo for cocoa puffs.

She is seeing and hearing Ali everywhere, she has officially gone off her rocker. She suggests to everyone that they don't give up the search to find Ali because at this point,bringing back the dead girl is the only way of saving their asses from frying.

With jail never looking as real as now, Spencer starts taking How to Survive in Jail lessons from a tutor who tells her the only way someone like her is going to survive is if she avoid jail time. And if she can't do that in the jail system then she has a way to buy a new identity and help her get out town...for a high price. As rich as her family is, Spencer doesn't have that kind of change. So she and her friends decide to visit Ali's crazy, dissed and not really missed, ex boyfriend, Nick.

That trip quickly becomes a waste of time. The only thing Nick really says is that he doesn't think Ali's dead, he isn't sure if she's using more of his families property to hide out, however he does get mighty bull-hurt when Emily lies and says Ali told her he meant nothing to her, and she really loved her all along. Using the information Nick gave them, Emily finds one of his families places that no one has checked out in Cape May. Emily convinces her friends to go off to the coast to check it out. But of course the place turns out to be a dead in.

Heartbroken and finally giving in to their fate, the girls decide to stay for the night not realizing that something is wrong with Emily. And something is wrong indeed. After all it was only the last book that the girl tried to kill herself. And it doesn't take long for her to return to her roots. She scribbles a note to her friends then takes to the sea.

While Spencer and the others catch on, but by the time they arrive, it's too late, Emily gives her self to the sea as the hurricane reaches land. Spencer stupidly tries to dive in after her but she is no match for them waves. She quickly passes out as Emily's head disappears under the waves.

When Spencer comes to, she's in the hospital getting yelled at by an officer and no one is answering her questions about Emily. Finally she finds out that Emily's body hasn't been recovered, her doctor is the guy she gave her virginity to and Emily has been deemed Lost At Sea.

Next thing we know, we're at Emily's funeral where her family is subtly blaming the rest of her friends for leading her on the wrong path and refusing to let her speak. This leads to a huge fight between the remaining Liars as Hanna and Spencer duke it out as Hanna blames Emily's death on her.

Pretty quickly after all this, Aria is like, "Fuck this! I'm out! Peace!"

She kisses her boyfriend goodbye before catching a plane to France leaving Spencer and Hanna to mourn and fend for themselves.

Hanna spends the night with Mike, and in the next morning they have a fight when he claims that he's going to wait for Hanna even if she goes to jail.

Okay, Mike, whatever you need to tell yourself at night. It's a pretty thought but your ass likes ass and sex too much to wait for Hanna for some 20+ years.

But then he surprises me by taking Hanna's very logical questions as ultimatum to prove his love and responds with:

He very obviously doesn't have a ring, so he gives her his lacrosse bracelet, and says they can marry before she goes away to the slammer.

And Hanna...says yes. (Falm palm.)

This is just going to make it so much harder on the both of you when Hanna does go away because now you have to get a divorce. But no one listens to me!

Both Hanna and Mike's parents give the okay and they immediately start planning the Red Carpet Wedding of the Series before they get taken to jail for life. It is somewhere during this mess that it is realized that Aria has flown the coup. You would think this would bring Hanna and Spencer closer together but all the bad words (not blood, words) between them keeps them apart.

Meanwhile, Aria hops across the seas to Paris. On the way there she pitifully thinks she sees Emily, but it's someone else. From there she runs to the place that she and the Nick-she-knew (was it Phineas?) stole that painting all that time ago. And much to her (and my surprise) is is waiting for her but her boyfriend, Noel himself.

They are happy for a while until her old insecurities about Ali come up, her paranoia about being found and a huge fight that ends with them both getting caught by Interpol and their asses being hauled back to the United States.

Back home, Hanna is happily planning her wedding. She invites her stepsister, Katie, but happily calls her dad and tells him that his ass is not invited. Go Hanna!

And Spencer is now contemplating flying the coup as she and Wren reconnect. Now that she and Melissa have a good relationship, she refuses to let him back into her life. However, Wren wants her so bad, he goes and talks to her sister to get her blessing. She gives it and Spencer gives into him.

Noel and Aria arrive back in the States just in time for Hanna's wedding. The remaining three make up then become Hanna's bridesmaids. Also, her dad shows up and begs for her to allow him to walk her down the aisle (I think he only wanted to for a publicity stunt. By this point Hanna and Mike's wedding was sponsored by Us Weekly and literally had a red carpet on it). Hanna forgives him and allows him stay but only lets her mom walk her down the alise. They are happily married with Hooter's girls serving the food at their reception and a nice tropical honeymoon in Hanna's backyard.

Unfortunately, this honeymoon doesn't last long. The verdict comes back and it's not looking good for the Liars. (Don't trials take months?) The jury has decided...

Guilty.

Hanna passes out after sharing a scared-shitless look with her husband because in all their planning they (somehow) never accounted for Hanna really going to jail. Next thing we know, the Liars are in their orange suits in thrown in prision where there are enough Ali-Cats and just Ali-admirers to make them crazy.

They've barely spent a night in jail when their lawyer comes to yank them out of jail because they have to go back to court. Why? Because someone is waiting for them...and it's none other then Emily!

...and she's not alone either.

She has Ali with her! 

It turns out Emily purposely faked her death. 

She did find a clue in Nick's house but it was in Florida and knew that the girls wouldn't have a way to investigate it while they were in custody. So she fabricated that suicide letter so no one would come looking for her. I knew it made no sense for her to die in that water. Anyone who knew her, knew she probably had the talents being a swimmer and all, to survive. But it worked in her favor. She was declared dead and took a bus to Florida where she all-too-easily found Ali and...her mother. (During the trial, only Ali's "dad" was at the trial while her mom's excuse was she was tired of all of this. But she wasn't. She was hiding Ali all along.)

Emily calls the cops as she spots Mrs. DD then Ali comes out with a gun. But it is too late, the cops are already here. Ali tries to hop a fence and escape, but she's not as fit as she used to be due to her too-good-of-a-disguise. The cop quickly catches her and Emily exposes her as a dead-girl. Ali tries to refute this claim but Mrs. DD hasn't gotten their new ID's yet, so they are all taken into custody then shipped back to Rosewood. 

All the charges against the Liars get dropped, Ali gets thrown into jail and everyone ends up happy. It's a little too wrapped up for my tastes.

Aria and Noel make up and she agrees to leave her Ali-insecurities in the past. They decide to try and travel Europe again, but this time while not being on the run.

Mike and Hanna move to NYC. She gets her movie role back and back into the Fashion Institute while he transfers to a high school in New York while they live in a apartment together.

Emily goes off by herself for a bit and learns how to surf and finds a new flirtation.

Spencer and Wren get back together and she takes a year off from Princeton.

Meanwhile, Ali bides her time. She's made herself seem insane so she can get thrown in a psych ward and learned from her mistakes of the past by counting on other people's help with her plans. She's coming back for the Liars...all she has to do is wait.

*Sigh* and that was the ending we waited so long for. Nothing really happened. It might've been so much more interesting if we had known that Emily was alive and followed her dangerous journey across the country. Otherwise, this entire book was just a filler until the end. I'm really disappointed that the final showdown with Ali literally took like 5 pages and was over just. Like. That. What a waste.

But at least it's over now! It only took 16 books and a re-boot!

Plot Hole: If the DD family lived in a different town before they moved to Rosewood, then when did Mrs. DD and Mr. Hastings meet and have the affair that conceived Ali and Country? If this is answered and I missed it, please let me know because I sure am wondering.

The Rules for Disappearing [The Rules #1]

She’s been six different people in six different places: Madeline in Ohio, Isabelle in Missouri, Olivia in Kentucky . . . But now that she’s been transplanted to rural Louisiana, she has decided that this fake identity will be her last. Witness Protection has taken nearly everything from her. But for now, they’ve given her a new name, Megan Rose Jones, and a horrible hair color. For the past eight months, Meg has begged her father to answer one question: What on earth did he do – or see – that landed them in this god-awful mess? Meg has just about had it with all the Suits’ rules — and her dad’s silence. If he won’t help, it’s time she got some answers for herself. But Meg isn’t counting on Ethan Landry, an adorable Louisiana farm boy who’s too smart for his own good. He knows Meg is hiding something big. And it just might get both of them killed. As they embark on a perilous journey to free her family once and for all, Meg discovers that there’s only one rule that really matters — survival.

When the novel opens, we met "Meg" in the middle of another transition to a new identity. For the last two (and a half, I think) years, Meg and her family have bounced from place to place on the run from someone or something that she has no idea who. Her once social and entertaining mother has become a alcoholic, her parents marriage is on the rocks, her little sister (affectionately nicknamed Tiny by family only) has stopped speaking and even reverted a bit in her child development.

In the beginning, she only thought it was temporary. She made friends, she joined teams, she even dated. But the end result remained the same. The suits (aka the WITSEC-Witness Protection agents) would always show up and relocate them. "Meg" has no idea what's happening. All she knows is, it's getting worse. During this new placement, she and her sister's long blonde hair has been cut and dyed brown and she's been forced to wear brown eye contacts as they relocate to Louisiana.

Understandably tired (emotionally cites the psychology side of me), "Meg" decides that she won't make friends or try to kindle anything with any guys during this placement. It's only going to result in a move anyway, right? Instead, her goal is to find out what her dad did to land them in the program. But it's hard. Her parents don't talk to each other and her father has terrible interactions with his daughters, although "Meg" doesn't help at all.

But of course, this being YA, "Meg" is going to find a guy who is determined to figure her out and get her to change her mind.

The moment that "Meg's" love interest was introduced, I was immediately creeped out. His name is Ethan Landry...you know, like the Ethan Landry who (highlight for spoiler) killed Sutton Mercer and dated her twin as she hunted for her sister's killer! Creepy! Anyways, Ethan is a downright Louisana-ian with a accent and boots to match. I spot his use in the novel the second "Meg" was checking him out in the office. Pretty soon after they meet, Ethan realizes that "Meg" knows nothing about the area (I think it was Oklahoma as her fake pre-move setting) she supposedly came from. Then he realizes that she isn't telling the truth and semi-understandably is intrigued to tries to question her and catch her in lies. Since we were following the story through "Meg's" point of view, I felt frustrated and annoyed by him for her. Did he not realize what he could do to her world? (Of course not, but I know more then he does, so I wanted him to stop).

But because guys think the word "no" is a challenge, Ethan keeps after her. In public, he covers for her litle blunders. In private, he still tries to catch her in a lie or reveal herself. "Meg" tries to stay away from him but when she gets a job at a local pizzeria, she doesn't realize that his aunt is the one who owns it. Because no one wants her sister to be home alone with her drunkard mother and her dad doesn't get off work til 7, Tiny comes to wor with "Meg." Ethan uses this time to do what her family couldn't in the past few months, he manages to bring out old-Tiny in a few days with her.

He even manages to hear "Meg" slip up when she calls her Tiny instead of her fake name "Mary." Using her little sister for information pays off. Halfway. Tiny slips up and mentions Naples, Florida, one of the places their family lived at during a placement where "Meg" was "Avery Preston." Using this city name, Ethan just so-magically stumbles across the article that got the "Preston's" booted from the Sunshine State. Before "Meg" made her no-friends, no-boys rule, she joined a dance team at one of her placement schools where she was mentioned and photographed in a article. 

Smh, amateur. 

Actually, not entirely.

"You can tell me anything. You should know that," Ethan says.

What, Ethan? What?

But "Meg" has her shit together. 

"How would I know that? I've been here for what...two weeks?" I spin around to face him. "And why so nosy about me?"

For real. Does he not get how weird and creepy he is? How many times does she have to tell him off about that?

"What gives you the right to say this shit to me? Why do you care where I'm from? Why is anything I do or say any of your business?" (You go, girl! Times two!)

Anyways, "Meg" hurries up and lies. She tells Ethan that she is Avery Preston and that her dad got into some trouble and she had to move. That's it. He doesn't get anything else.

I will say that "Meg" impressed me. Some YA girls with secrets feel the urge to reveal their secrets to persistent boys far too soon for the relationship to have convinced me. "Meg" didn't feel the urge for a while and even then she fought it until he forced her hand. But more about that later.

During this persistent chase of "Meg" she tries to chase down information. Her dad won't tell her squat and her mom just tells her to ask her dad. (Isn't that backwards?)

But her dad won't tell her crap. So "Meg" has to resort to listening to her dad's phone calls and trying to write everything out in her cryptically kept journal. "Meg's" managed to keep the journal hidden from the suits during the moves and although she writes about her life and her repeated nightmares, she keeps it just vague enough. But then one night while she's doing laundry, someone steals her journal and she is heartbroken. (I predicted this during reading, but I thought it was going to be Ethan's cheerleading twin and her minions who don't like "Meg").

Ethan eventually gets to a point where he won't let "Meg" make her own decisions and when she seems wary about going on a date with him, he tells her when he's showing up to pick up even though she hadn't said yes yet. At another placement, "Meg" had a boyfriend named Tyler. One night he was supposed to pick her up so they could go to a Halloween party together, but she gets ripped from her placement. The feds don't even let her call him to tell him not to wait, so it's kind of haunted "Meg" ever since that she doesn't know how long he waited for her, before he realized she wasn't coming and he had been stood up.

By this point it doesn't matter. Ethan and "Meg" are dating/talking but not yet official. They skip class together, she goes over his house, they attend parties together. Basically, everything she said she wanted to do, she ends up doing the opposite of.

No boys Ethan Landry, basically her boyfriend
No friends Will and Catherine, another couple that Ethan and "Meg" double up with
Find answers She fails dramatically at this. She only overhears the one conversation her dad is having with the evil people trying to secure a deal and save his family.

One day "Meg" tries to skip school and look up answers on a coffee house computer, but a suit named Agent Thomas shows up and stops her. "Meg" thinks Agent T is actually a decent human being compared to the rest of the suits. He actually interacts with her and her family. The first time she talks to him it's because she finds a card in her mother's stuff and calls him. He makes an effort to reach out and help "Meg" but she's unwilling to accept it at the moment.

And that's not the only thing haunting her. "Meg's" been haunted by nightmares for a while now. And after one of her nightmares/flashbacks to the night she left her first life, it finally hits me. 78 pages into my 228 page e-book I figured it out.

It isn't her father who did or saw something, it's her.

There's a reason "Meg" can only remember bits and pieces from that night. She heard one of her best friends sneaking around with her longtime crush and her other best friend talking shit about her. Angry, she goes to a party with some lower class-men and gets drunk. And that's the most of what she can remember.

But that's not all that happened.

"Meg" realizes this while on a triple date with Ethan and his dad, his twin and her on-again-off-again boyfriend and his dad, Will and Catherine. Ethan decides to take her on a hog chasing shot out and the blood that hits her and what-not makes the rising memories completely rise to the surface.\

Ethan takes her home and she has a confrontation with her drunk mother. During which, her mother tells her the only reason any of this has happened is because of her, not her father. She wasn't supposed to be there, but she was.

See, what happened was: after getting drunk, "Meg" went over her crush, Brandon's house whose dad is also her dad's business partner. There, she sees his dad hide some ledgers before a man breaks into the house, threatens him and kills him. Brandon happens to walk into the room (she's hiding so no one knows she's there) and gets shot and killed. This is the death that traumatizes her. The killer happens to find her hiding space and to keep him from killing her, she tells him she knows where the ledgers are. Before she can tell him though, the cops show up and he disappears. It turns out he works for the Mexican drug cartel and her crushes dad had been handling their books for a while. The feds got on his tail and he was planning to give them up until the cartel found out and put a hit on his head. "Meg" wasn't supposed to be there. But she was and she saw it all.

She tells her dad that she remembers everything and they kind of mourn together. She learns that the suits wanted to put her in counseling to make her remember but he refused because he didn't want to do that to her. The two of them try to figure out all of their options. But there really isn't that many options. So she tries to have a top secret meeting with Agent T who isn't old or dumb. He quickly asks if a boy has anything to do with her change of heart but she denies it. (But it does. It so does.)

Finally, she comes up with a plan. She'll just go back home, find the ledgers, give them to the Bad Guy and everyone will be safe! She runs away but Ethan is a persistent little guy and sees what she's doing and follows her. She tries to keep him out of the know but he threatens to throw her out of the car. So she tells him everything. Together, they have a road trip which includes bloody confessions and steam filled make out scenes (to the narrator anyway). The climax was kind of boring. "Meg" uses her old two-faced friends to get to Brandon's house and get the ledger. But after she finds it, Agent T shows up and takes it from her.

Then (predictable) twist number two: Agent T is evil! He isn't a suit at all, he's been watching "Meg" under the feds noses because he works for the Mexican cartel and very nicely left "Meg" alive and took off with the ledger. With the guy hunting her dead and the ledgers done, "Meg" and her family get to come out of hiding. Her house gets a upgrade, her mom goes to rehab and she and Ethan finally DTR (define the relationship).

At the end, Meg-who-is-really-Anna, mysteriously finds her journal in her pocket. Along with a note and a daisy. The note reveals that the trackers were smart and clever trick (but not smart or clever enough) and that they thought she should have her journal back. Then, the note vaguely mentions, maybe I'll see you again. Which freaks Anna out to the core. She just got her life back. This isn't over after all.

However, the twist is the "T" who signed the note isn't Fake-Agent Thomas...but you'll have to read the book (or my review of the next book) to find out who it is... (That's when it's revealed to the reader; I've already started reading it).

The Chaos of Stars (Kiersten White)

Kiersten White, New York Times bestselling author of Paranormalcy, is back with The Chaos of Stars—an enchanting novel set in Egypt and San Diego that captures the magic of first love and the eternally complicated truth about family. Isadora's family is seriously screwed up—which comes with the territory when you're the human daughter of the ancient Egyptian gods Isis and Osiris. Isadora is tired of living with crazy relatives who think she's only worthy of a passing glance—so when she gets the chance to move to California with her brother, she jumps on it. But her new life comes with plenty of its own dramatic—and dangerous—complications . . . and Isadora quickly learns there's no such thing as a clean break from family.

I'm starting to realize something. If I stop reading a book in the midst of it, (unless I'm at school, then this doesn't apply) there's probably a reason. I've noticed that. I still haven't finished Revealed of the House of Night series. Oh, I've started it and I've read the end but even now as I try to push myself through it for the second time, I just can't do it.

This beautiful cover got me and the name and time period in which it was published had me confusing it with These Broken Stars. Both have exquisitely made covers. But this book made me realize what guys mean when they complain about push up bras or leggings are false advertisements about some girls bodies. That's what beautiful book covers are when the content inside doesn't live up to the cover.

(BTW: I loved Isadora's name.) She is the mortal daughter born to Egyptian gods, Isis and Osiris in the present day times in Egypt. She is sixteen and hasn't traveled past the Nile. However, her mother has had bad omens that something bad is about to happen to her as well as Isadora in her dreams. Isadora doesn't believe that dreams can be connected to the future so she lies to her mother about\their dreams similarities. Isadora is bitter because as a child she grew up believing she was immortal like her parents and would live forever. However, when a childhood pet dies and her parents tell her it will join her in the afterlife, she realizes that isn't their plan for her. Creepily enough, they've already had her start designing her tomb as a child.

Isadora grow up into a bitter teen who believes her mother only has children (one every 20 years) because  the modern world no longer worships them and lives off her children's worship. She even names her children variations of her and her husbands names (ex. Isadora; Sirus) Isis decides to keep her daughter safe, she'll send her off to San Diego where her second-to-last child, Sirus resides. Isadora is happy about this because her mother has decided to have another baby four years before her typical pattern.

But something has followed Isadora to San Deigo. And it's no Big, Bad, Evil. Instead, it's a bad smell (later followed by a Big, Bad, Evil but not until much, much later).

Anyways, Isis forces Isadora to take a job at a museum full of artifacts she has donated for a brief collection. There Isadora meets a ash-blonde teen girl named Tyler (oh, gosh) who also works at the museum.

Isadora, declares Tyler is the Most Interesting Person ever and decides to make her her San Diego go-to-BFF. Tyler has a boyfriend named Scott (a guy) who has a friend named Ry (also a guy) who is named after Orion. This is relevant because for as long as she can remember, Isadora has had a fixation on the constellation Orion although her mother hates all things Greek for stealing all the God-worshiping mortals from her. Anyway, Ry writes epic poetry and his family is Greek. I knew he especially would be important because during Isadora's Isis rebellion in San Diego, she cuts and dyes her hair. When he sees her, he "stares at me like he's seen a ghost. Even his olive skin has paled" and says, "Your hair. I didn't recognize you before... I didn't recognize you when we met before. But now I do." 

Later, Isadora finds out that she and her family aren't the only gods out there. Orion isn't the original Orion but named after him. He isn't immortal either but the son of Aphrodite and Hephaestus who are happily in love.

Aphrodite who cheats on her ugly, unwanted blacksmith of a husband, Hephaestus for Ares numerous times in mythology. Hephaestus even catches them in old myths! You're trying to tell me they are in love?

But it only gets worse. During the moment where this is revealed to Isadora, Ry also ILY's her. That's right, he tells her he loves her!

That's when I was really done.

Even she says it: dude, you don't even know her! And his explanation that she's been in his dreams for years holds no gravity. He just looked at her as stone, that's it. I really thought this book wasn't going to do that. Ry and Isadora had only spent time together eating and working on her exhibit. He knows she's from Egypt, she has some family issues/problems and she loves interior design. She knows he has Greek heritage, he writes epic poetry (Seriously, what the fuck?) and...that's about it, other then he is homeschooled.

I didn't like Ry as a love interest for a number of reasons. Maybe it wasn't dislike and more that the author didn't convince me. She didn't even fully convince Isadora! Actually, he does know something else about Isadora. Isadora tells him she just wants to be friends. She can't stand commitment because she can barely deal with facing her own eventual death, let alone losing someone else. Initially, Ry agrees with this but like all YA guys, he doesn't know when to stop pushing. He tries to hold Isadora's hand during a movie and she runs away. His excuse is that "friends hold hands."

The fuck they do!

After Isadora runs away from him (specifically his love revelation since she runs away from him a lot), the half-assed Evil plot joins the climax. Other than bad smells, a house break in and a museum guard getting put in the hospital and bad dreams, the Evil barely shows up in the story. Most time is spent doing things to rebell against Isis and fight her attraction towards Ry. When Isadora is running away from Ry's stupid love confession she runs into her creepy half brother/cousin Anubis (his mom and Isis sister got sick of trying to get Set-her hubby-to sleep with her, so she pretended to be Isis and slept with Orsirus. Thus, Anubis is born. He rules the Underworld with their father but wants more out of life. Understandable.) The funky smell we've Isadora's been dealing with all novel is the smell of the liquid Egyptians put their organs and crap in when they are mummified. (Disgusting!) He forces Isadora to read her mothers hand on one of the artifacts that reveals a snake that can poison gods. Isis is the only one who can bring gods back to life, but if she is killed, anyone-even the gods-can be dead for good.

Ry, Ty and Sy Scott save Isadora from Anubis but he already has what he wants. It takes all night and a concussion for Isadora to figure out his plan.

Ry, who doesn't listen to Isadora when she told him she needed space when she went home alone, is outside her house and ready to give her access to his Greek God private plane that takes her to Egypt. Once there, Isadora realizes she was wrong about his accomplice. She was too busy slut-shaming her brother's, Horus' (or Whore-us as she confusingly refers to him) wife Hathor (the goddess of sex and beer), she doesn't realize Anubis' accomplice is his mother/her aunt. Her aunt has been poisoning Isis during her pregnancy and has gotten away with it without Isadora there to realize what's going on.

The demon her aunt leaves to take care of her, very easily lets her pass, and Isadora leaves Ry to deal with Anubis. She bursts into her mothers birthing chamber where her aunt is with the God-killing snake. Her aunt releases the snake and it launches at Isadora...who conveniently is still wearing the gold wristlet/bracelet Ry gave her before his declaration of love. The snake's fangs get stuck in it and she remains safe. She tells her parents all about her aunt's evil plans and her mother decides to forget her name which apparently was the only thing keeping her aunt alive. Cast out, Isadora's mom starts giving birth to a daughter named Dora and she decides to possibly (forget it, you know she is) giving Ry a chance although she doesn't believe in his love-crap baloney.

Sigh. I will never get these hours back. Just think about all that time and beautiful book cover wasted on this book. It could've been so much more.  

Ask Again Later (Liz Czukas)

Despite what her name might suggest, Heart has zero interest in complicated romance. So when her brilliant plan to go to prom with a group of friends is disrupted by two surprise invites, Heart knows there's only one drama-free solution: flip a coin. Heads: The jock. He might spend all night staring at his ex or throw up in the limo, but how bad can her brother's best friend really be? Tails: The theater geek...with a secret. What could be better than a guy who shares all Heart's interests--even if he wants to share all his feelings? Heart's simple coin flip has somehow given her the chance to live out both dates. But where her prom night ends up might be the most surprising thing of all..

I swear, if people start falling over themselves over Schroeder like the people fan-girling over immortal stalkers like Edward Cullen, I'm going to scream!

This book literally only had a handful of guys I actually liked. And only one of them was a secondary character who was actually developed past his name and relationship to the protagonist. That was Ryan. Ryan is the first guy (actually the only guy) that asks Heart (I think this author won the award for wildest, most out there names for YA protagonists) to prom. He actually is gay and I think he's going it to cover up the truth. I'm not exactly sure. Anyway, he and Heart are actually cool, they bond over French and are both drama geeks. He was the only one who didn't walk around with typical sexist thoughts and ideas and kept calling Heart out on her gayist (? I don't know what to call this) remarks towards him during their night.

The other three guys who got frequent page-time were straight up jackasses.

First, you got Phil, the epitome of misogynistic guys. He's Heart's brother, a football player and typical to most YA stories: with parents who are never around (their dad is busy with his carpet business and their mom ditched them a long time ago). Anyway, Phil promises his recently dumped football buddy, Troy, that his sister will go with him to prom so he doesn't have to experience it alone. He doesn't even ask Heart and she has a problem because she tries to make as many people happy at once. However, she doesn't realize or care that it comes at the expense of herself.

In the life where Heart chooses to go to prom with Troy, her brother is a complete jackass. There's this point where a drunken Troy forces his lips on a unwilling Heart and her brother has the audacity to tell her she's "overreacting" and stop being such a baby when she tries to tell him that she didn't want it. Phil even goes on to say, "he probably thought you wanted it."

And that, my dear children, is what you call rape culture. And it only gets worse as the story goes on. Heart begs him to take her home and he refuses. Heart spends the rest of the prom with her friends until he manipulates her into being Troy's babysitter since he's drunk out of his mind and spending the rest of the night taking care of him.

Heart's original plan was to go to prom with her big group of friends, including her real love interest Schroeder. He calls her different parts of the human body and she also addresses him by a nickname. His real name is Chase but he reminds Heart of this kid:

Now I hated his character. He is a straight up jackass. And the reasons given to explain his screwed up behavior don't sit well with me. He has a problem with Heart choosing to deviate from the original plan of going to the prom with her friends because he doesn't have the balls to ask her out himself. Sure, Heart has this poorly developed idea that she won't date therefore she can't end up like her mother: getting pregnant and starting a family you aren't ready for and skip the town on.

However, he spends most of the book mad at her because she went to prom with other guys. When some condoms come out of her purse (that her aunt provided in her prom-goodie bag) and she and Ryan laugh about it, he looks at her with disappointment. I really hope that look was because he was jealous and not that he was putting her down for having sex with Ryan on prom night.

Either way, the exchange he and Heart have about her drinking in a car with Troy after he tried to tongue-her-down really sealed the deal about my feelings towards him:

"I can't believe you," he said.
I drew back with a pissy look. "Excuse me?"
"I just can't believe you'd be that stupid....It didn't occur to you that being incapacitated might be dangerous around Troy."

Oh yeah, dude, because if Troy had raped her, it would've been Heart's fault for getting into a car with him as well as getting intoxicated around him which invited the rape onto herself. It's her prom night too and if she wants to drink she should get to without having to worry about having to fight off attackers. How about telling him not to rape her, instead of blaming for putting herself at risks. He even tells her that she got lucky because Troy could've raped her, he just didn't.

Ugh, in the end, Ryan makes her realize that she has feelings for Schroedur but he's too busy being stupid that they can't work it out. So their friends lock them in a trunk to work out their problems. And they do, annoyingly enough. Heart realizes that her no-dating rule is a little strict and decides to give way to Schroedur. They start dating on the end of both sides of Heart's choices. We never learn which one she really chose but at the end Heart gets deja vu about things that she's experienced in both lives. But either way she ends up at the lake with her friends and Schroedur. 

Ugh, please do not waste the time I did reading this book. 

Second Star (Alyssa B. Sheinmel)

A twisty story about love, loss, and lies, this contemporary oceanside adventure is tinged with a touch of dark magic as it follows seventeen-year-old Wendy Darling on a search for her missing surfer brothers. Wendy’s journey leads her to a mysterious hidden cove inhabited by a tribe of young renegade surfers, most of them runaways like her brothers. Wendy is instantly drawn to the cove’s charismatic leader, Pete, but her search also points her toward Pete's nemesis, the drug-dealing Jas. Enigmatic, dangerous, and handsome, Jas pulls Wendy in even as she's falling hard for Pete. A radical reinvention of a classic, Second Star is an irresistible summer romance about two young men who have yet to grow up--and the troubled beauty trapped between them.

I tried to read this book.

I really did.

I thought, Peter Pan retelling?

Awesome!

A younger, sexier Hook?

Awesomer!

A love triangle between Peter Pan and Hook...

Anyway, the story opens just after teenage Wendy Darling has graduated. She lives on the coast of California with her parents, her dog, Nana and her missing brothers, John and Michael. Her brothers are twins and surfers who disappeared one pregnancy nine months ago. (Haha, that's all I could think when she said nine months.) She has a best friend named Fiona, who doesn't go, do or think without her boyfriend at her side. This part of Fiona's cardboard character really bothered annoyed me.

Anyway, Wendy soon meets Peter Pan's Second Star counterpart, Pete. Pete is a surfer and former foster care teen who lives with a bunch of other runaways (all teens; no kids in this world) in a abandoned mansion on a cliff. Pretty soon into meeting him, Wendy falls for Pete, who kisses her, although he has this complicated relationship with a blonde named Belle.

They spend the night together, the night they meet, just kissing. Not even making out, just kissing. Pete seems nice and boring enough. Soon after meeting him, Wendy lies to her parents that she is going on a road trip with her best friend and like typical YA parents, they're all like, Sure, honey, whatever you like. We're barely around anyway!

Then she enlists the help of her best friend into lying to her parents and tells Fiona that she's going on a trip
Wendy doesn't go to Neverland. Instead, she goes to Kensie Cove or Kensington (a allusion to the Kensington Gardens in which Peter Pan lived before Neverland) and meets this guy named Pete. He is a former foster care kid who lives with  a bunch of runway teens in abandoned mansions in the cove. He takes Wendy in and teaches her to surf which is something her brothers never did.

However, Pete is also a liar because he knew John and Michael, but lies to Wendy about it early in the novel. From what I learned from skimming and skipping around, the twins used to live with Pete and his gang until he found out they were using fairy dust and kicked them out.

Belle later reveals that she saw what happened. John and Michael were high on 'dust' and tried to surf a forty foot wave. She doesn't say it out loud, but alludes to their death after they wiped out.

The other half of the Kensie belongs to his former partner, Jas (aka Hook) who now deals a drug called fairy dust and has a gang full of dusters who live with him. Jas and Pete used to be surfing buddies (think Plankton and Mr. Krabs) until Jas started dealing and Pete excommunicated him from his house.

Angry about Pete's lies, Wendy leaves and goes and joins up with Jas' crew. However, to get into his house to look for him she has to take some dust. That's the price to get in. She does and the stuff messes her up so bad that she ends up on Fiona's front step. Fiona calls her parents who take her home and send her too her room to "re-establish authority."

This is especially funny because while she is locked away in her room, Jas shows up and they run away to try to look for her brothers. It was around here that I just couldn't take anymore and gave up reading this book. Now I understand the term DNF (Did Not Finish) when it should be called CNF-Could Not Finish.

At the end, Wendy is with Jas, Pete and Belle as this famous waved called Witch Tree shows up. Something happens as the the wave hits and her last memories are of Jas. Then she wakes up in the psych ward of a hospital with her parents.

They tell her she wasn't on a boat with Jas, Pete, Belle and crew.There were no boats out on the sea during the storm because Coast Guard shut the area down. Instead, she tried to swim out into the sea during a storm on Pebble Beach. And no one brought Wendy to the hospital because she was alone. Basically, the girl is crazy.Her brothers are still missing at sea (aka dead) and she imagined everything. Fiona is the only one who has realized that she has gone crazy.

She either went went off the deep end due to her grief and started doing the combination of drugs that make up dust or the drug cocktail made her lose her mind. Either way, she's off her rocker, they say. So she goes through therapy and starts saying everything's fake to convince her parents no matter how wrong it feels to her.

Until it doesn't anymore.

She gets out the crazy house and slowly bides her time until everyone trusts her again. Then, Wendy eventually goes back to Kensington Cove to see if it really wasn't real. Apparently, the place was once called Kensington Beach before all the mansions in the area were abandoned. The houses are empty and rundown without any trace of Pete or Jas or their crews. The beach doesn't even exist. There's no white sand just a bunch of waves and rocks.

I'm sure this novel would be better if the author hadn't tried to connect the story to Peter Pan. I might've even enjoyed it more. I mean, I kind of understand the connection. Wendy (and her brothers) run away with Peter Pan to Neverland because they weren't ready to grow up at the moment. Peter Pan offers that escape.

Eventually, however, Wendy comes to the realization that she has to and is ready to grow up and she and her brothers go home.

Wendy in Second Star goes to Pete and Kensie Cove to find her brothers... Although, if she's truly crazy then she went to Kensie Cove because she isn't quite ready to face her brothers death. Which is also representative of the escape Pete provides her. However, eventually she allows herself to come to terms with it (aka when Belle tells her she witnessed). See, that's soo interesting. It just would've been a lot better if the story wasn't connected to Peter Pan. I just wasn't feeling it.

I especially felt like What the fuck? because at the end Wendy receives some mail. It's a picture inside a envelope without any address or stamps because someone just slipped it in the mailbox. And the picture is of Jas and Pete with surfboards and their arms around each other. Suddenly, Wendy starts wondering if the Witch Tree wave could've washed out the beach, messed up Pete's house and literally swallow her memories. She isn't crazy, she decides. Jas must've pushed her in the right current then saved the others then he and Pete went off the surf the world together. But someone wanted her to know it was all real.

...or maybe she's just crazy after all and put that picture in her own mailbox.

And if that's true, then what was the point of the story? Either way, I sure was disappointed.